Frustration: The definition of frustration is the state of being annoyed or a source of annoyance.
Read more at http://www.yourdictionary.com/frustration#wqufMI4LKCbdXqib.99
Frustration is a funny emotion. It can turn into so many different things. Sometimes I end up using it as a catch all for completely different and opposing emotions. Anger. Joy. Excitement. Most of the time I say that I’m frustrated to keep myself from becoming angry. I don’t enjoy being angry. However, anger is an emotion that I’m allowed to feel. I shouldn’t try to hide or disguise my anger. I should just be angry for a moment and then move past it. It something in my brain has told me that being angry is bad. Being angry causes you to lose control of who you are. Being angry is what causes someone to kill someone. I don’t want to kill anyone. I don’t want to hurt someone no matter how much I say it jokingly. So I lie to myself and pass my anger off as mere frustration in hopes that I won’t offend or hurt anyone. All the while I’m destroying the meaning of the words frustration and anger. Because although they may be similar in meaning, each word has its own definition.
Angry: The definition of angry is feeling or showing strong discontent or resentment.
Read more at http://www.yourdictionary.com/angry#bpP1okyWTG2xjkDF.99
And although many will be angry with me for saying this, there is a stigma that goes with being an angry black person or even an angry black man. My friends and family know that I am slow to raise my voice, even slower to raise a hand. I’m afraid that the one time someone sends me over the edge I’ll be held to that new standard and be seen as an angry black man. They imprison, demean, degrade, and kill angry black men. I don’t want to be any of those things. I don’t want any of those things to happen to me. So I hide my anger as frustration in the hope that it will pass more quickly and I can go back to being normal. Being accepted. Being who I know I am. This morning I became frustrated but as I just revealed to you, on the inside, I was angry.